Simple, non-cheesy ways to make over your self-image

Sometimes it seems self-loathing is a favorite national pastime. But look: if you're denying yourself a good life until you feel like you've done something to deserve it, you could be waiting forever. Wouldn't it be kind of radical to start accepting ourselves the way we are right this second? Not when we lose 10 pounds, not when we've paid off our mountain of debt, not when we reach the top rung of our career ladder, but right now. Here are nine ideas to get you going.

#1 Dig through the photo albums.. It doesn't matter if your childhood wasn't perfect, and if you didn't grow up on sitcom, it probably wasn't. But that's not the point. What we're after is photographic evidence of a time when we were free from the negative ideas we've collected about ourselves as we've grown up. Maybe you're playing in the sand at the beach, doing a cartwheel in the front yard, or totally engrossed in a coloring book. Whatever you're doing, chances are you weren't ruminating on your personal limitations, whether real or imagined. You were just you, and that was cool. Put this photo on your dresser.

#2 Make a list of things you do well and what you've achieved... Think actions. Are you a great gardener, mathematician, horseback rider? Did you write a paper in college you're still proud of or perfect a pie crust that makes people swoon? Make a list of all things you pretty much rock at.

#3 Spread those talents around. A surefire ways to feel better about yourself is, ironically, to stop focusing on yourself. Think of ways other people can benefit from your skills. If you're a great cook, take a casserole to a neighbor. If you're a fabulous conversationalist or a compassionate listener, volunteer at a senior citizens home.


#4 Pick a memory of you at your happiest. It's like a mental scrapbook. Comb through the images of your life for a time when you felt alive and energized. Flip to that image whenever necessary.

#5 Write a list of your best qualities. What do people always compliment you on? Do you have a smile that lights up the room? Unflappable optimism? Put it all down in black and white.

#6...and the qualities you wish you had. So what is it that you really don't like about yourself? Are you too judgmental or quick to temper? Think in concrete terms about where you've got room for improvement. We have to bring awareness to a thing before we can change it.


#7 Compliment others. If you're going to start feeling better about yourself, you might want to start acknowledging the worth in others. Your new motto: if you think something nice, say it. Very few people take the time to compliment others, and it's always appreciated.

#8 Get moving. Studies show that exercising for the general goals of health and fitness, rather than cosmetic reasons, are associated with increased self-esteem. Take a walk, throw a frisbee around, go for a run around the neighborhood, but do it for the mood boost and the boon to your health, not for punitive reasons.

#9 Get affirmative. Most of us get squirmy when someone starts talking about looking in the mirror and telling ourselves we are wondrous beings. Instead, write down the least gag-worthy sentence you can think of. Come up with something simple like, "I'm doing the best I can" or turn to some wise words from others. Paste your motto on the inside of your medicine cabinet, or set it as your computer background so each morning when you boot up, you give yourself a little boost.